moving moving moving
so i don’t talk too much about my family in my blog, because they honestly aren’t that big a part of my life. but here’s a small family description-
my mom is a typical housewife who is also a lawyer and is very very closeminded about everything. doesn’t know i drink, didn’t know i had sex (til i got pregnant), goes through life with her rose-colored glasses. she has been married to my dad for 27 years, and counting…
my dad is the most intelligent man i’ve ever met, but at times it’s so condescending it’s hard to deal with. he is very right-wing, very opinionated, and very disappointed in me for having an abortion.
my sister is 4 years older than me. when we were kids we were best friends, but when she went off to college she came back a strung-out druggie who hated me and so since then we haven’t been close. she got pregnant, stopped all the bad shit she was doing, and is now an amazing mom to my nephew who is 3. we are slowly getting closer.
my brother is a year older than me, and completely unmotivated. whereas i want a career and a family and a good life, he just wants to get drunk and chase girls. case in point- he’s moving to miami with his best friend and dropping out of college.
anyway so i’m home for easter. my cousin is getting married in two weeks and there is a shit ton of drama going on. to relieve some of the tension, me and my sister, and my two cousins went out for tapas and martinis last night. it was SO delicious, and just being around my family and not being the “baby” or treated like i’m 10 was nice.
afterwards we went and did karaoke and got shit-faced. a lot was said, most of it surprising and hurtful- like everyone in my family thinks my mom is an alcoholic, my dad can’t even look at me because i had an abortion, etc.
i am just going through so much right now, i feel like i’m crazy. one day i’m on top of the world, the next day i want to die. and on top of all of it, my best friend has completely gone AWOL. i call her, i try and talk to her, and she doesn’t give a shit about me. she told me she was “done” with our friendship. i just don’t know what to do. everyone who is supposed to always be there for me isn’t.
it sucks.
