backlash (and a couple tears)
i feel like every day i take 3 steps forward, and 4 steps back. if i wake up and go to class, i forget that we had homework. if i study hard for a quiz, it’s postponed a few days. if i go and work out, i overeat to compensate. if i make a good grade, i make three bad grades. every day it seems like such a struggle to do things that normal people can do without thinking. i have to plan every single minute of my day or else i lay in bed all day watching old grey’s anatomy episodes. life shouldn’t be this difficult to get through, right?
so today i had a totally productive day. i went to both my classes, squared away my absences with a professor, took my entrance exam to be full-status for my major and passed so now i’m cleared for advanced classes AND got a B on my midterm. did i mention i also worked out, ate somewhat healthy (steamed vegetables for dinner??!), and am currently at the library (somewhat) studying.
i was feeling pretty darn good about myself until five minutes ago. so as i mentioned i had my officer title revoked for being gone like all last semester. so what did i do this semester? worked my butt off to get in everyone’s good graces and i decided to run for co-president of the organization. seeing as how i have been a member for 2 years, was the only candidate with any officer experience, and i am generally a good leader i figured i had a pretty good shot with four girls running and two winning the title of co-president.
well, i got only 9 votes. 28% of the vote. least votes of all the candidates.
and i feel shitty shitty shitty. just when i think that i’m finally getting this whole time management thing down (four semester into college, so it was about time) and now i feel absolutely disappointed.
three steps forward, four steps back.
i need a hug.
